I have no legitimate reason to leave the house today. I fully admit that I am driving half an hour over the mountain to get lunch because I am TIRED of hanging out with the dog.
I will always pronounce diaspora wrong despite knowing the correct pronunciation. It was too ingrained in my mind before I ever heard someone say it aloud.
My flowerbed is actually fairly decent this summer instead of being a scraggly bunch of half-dead plants and random garbage that blew into it and I was too lazy to deal with. Look at me being all not-quite-so-white-trash with my bad self.
Am I really ready to get pregnant again? When I do, I’ll have to give up the ridiculous amounts of coffee, Diet Coke, and wine I currently consume. Am I ready for that kind of commitment?
Sometimes I think, “Hey, all this baby lifting and carrying must be making me really strong.” And then I try to do a pull-up and we all have a good laugh.
I don’t know if I’m just tired (I am), but I am utterly enchanted by the TV show Little Einsteins.
Tommy seems to love avocado and is therefore allowed to remain in the family. Also, the dog loves avocado.
Somehow I can never find the mail key despite the fact that I think I leave it in the same place every time.
I fully understand the experience behind the product that is essentially a baby-sized straight jacket that straps squirmy babies to their changing table. Two words: poop wrestling.
I felt genuine anger at my infant son for slapping the cookie out of my hand. Don’t you understand? I had a SALAD for lunch. I DESERVE this.
I wonder if there’s a correlation between the number of head bonks a baby experiences and his later intelligence. Maybe I should see if I can get this kid to wear a helmet until he’s a bit more stable. *Google, google, google* Nah, he’s fine. It’s not like we’ll be able to put him through Harvard anyways.